Dear Sanusi Lamido: Pinky and the Brain

Dear Sanusi,

Question is what were you doing being an Emir?

That was my first genuine question when I heard you would become the Emir of Kano.

It tortured my emotions.

This Brain was going to go sit in a palace sorounded by dry lands and allow the Pinkies rule the world?

I soliloquized.

Yeah, you know — Pinky and the Brain!

But many felt the Brain was going to become Emir in 2014 so that he could avoid some fraudulent charges from his tenure at the CBN.

Hey, read Wikipedia, this is not me piecing untrue facts together. I am just trying to arrive at the bottom of this saga.

But I was bothered.

I felt your position should be at the very least head of the National House of Assembly.

You spoke like a president would. And being a Governor really looked like a bad thing for you.

That was how I reasoned it. And now it’s even more ridiculous that it’s even a Governor that has removed you from seat.

Quirky.

Strangely funny.

But this is where we are now.

You have been barnished.

Back to the labour market.

Hustling resumes.

Where would you start from though?

For a man who has offended Buhari, Jonathan, Boko Haram, and even Pastor Enouch Adeboye — you seem to have offended them all.

You and Sowore seem to have something in common. Perhaps you peeps should join forces.

But where will your allies come from?

Now in a grand scheme of some funny scripting. Your grand-uncle, Ado Bayero, is eventually having his son back on the throne.

The 2014 protests of your appointment seem to have scored an important goal — a Bayero is crowned Emir.

But.

What if this is an own goal?

You are smart.

You are damn intelligent.

What if this was a plan from day one?

Simple plan:

— Run away from Jonathan and those who intended to pin you down with a case attached to the CBN gig.

— Become powerful and gain immunity as Emir.

— Then come back to the deal when the eyes were off and away.

Maybe…

Perhaps you wanted the sack.

You couldn’t just walk away from the throne without a genuine excuse.

What if you started pressing on the Governor so he can eventually sack you?

Who will speak heavily against the government policies, break royal traditions, critize the state government, tell the Governor he is chasing misplaced priorities? When he knows the Governor has the powers to dethrone him.

Who?

Based on all your royal activisms. The emirate council was under investigation for corruption. It’s reported that, “many saw that as retribution over comments you made. The investigation was later called off by the state legislature following intervention by the ruling class”.

And In 2019, when Governor Abdullahi Umar Ganduje signed into law the creation of four new emirates. That should have warned you of the possibilities to come.

Because that unprecedented move saw your traditional domain as emir reduced. According to the law, you could only then preside over 10 local government areas out of the 44 in the state.

But you didn’t bow.

Until the Governor could no longer endure your opposition.

So while many see this as politics.

I choose to imagine and assume.

Just what if the joke is on us?

A good script writer would pull such twist.

At least now you are a free man. Back to what you went to school for — global and international economics.

Good thing is right now South Africa is hiring.

And we know the World Bank can always use a head like yours.

So there.

I hear about other financial allegations levied against you. I see that in the news. Not sure of the authenticities. But you haven’t gone to court or answered to the allegations.

So what if that is part of the grand plan. To have and move such gigantic funds abroad. And by so doing you are back to the fun you left behind in 2014 — bigger and richer.

You have tasted both worlds.

Now it’s time to rock and roll.

With four wives.

You can start a sabbatical from Nasarawa. When the coast is cleared you can rock New York City. Or somewhere in Beverly hills.

This is just me thinking wide.

Your Pinky and The Brain spotter,

Ediale

#ForTheCulture

PS: Because let’s face it. You are smarter than all these Pinkies. You are the Brain.