10 habits of weak, unsuccessful people you should avoid

August 7, 2019
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1. They’re always distracted

Essentialism, by Greg McKeown, is one of my favorite books. McKeown shares the story of when he met his former classmate, years after graduating.

He told McKeown that he was in between jobs and asked if McKeown could help him. Twenty seconds into the conversation the guy got a text and started looking down to his phone and started responding.

McKeown says: “Ten seconds went by. Then twenty. I simply stood there as he continued to text away furiously.” After two minutes he gave up and walked away from the obsessive texter.

Don’t live your life in the future or past, lost in thoughts and worry. If that guy from the example was present, he might have got an awesome job recommendation from Greg McKeown.

2. They only talk the talk

You know what’s better than talking about something? Doing it.

In 2010, Derek Sivers gave a TED talk called ” Keep your goals to yourself,” where he presented scientific evidence that talking about your goals is counterproductive.

We see it all the time in real life and on social media: “I’m training for a marathon.” “I’m starting a business.”

The crazy thing is how people react. They applaud you for announcing something. Let’s pause for a second: Saying you want to run a marathon and actually running a marathon are two different things, right?

In your brain, those things are actually not that far apart. Derek Sivers says:

“When you tell someone your goal and they acknowledge it, psychologists have found that it’s called a ‘social reality.’ The mind is kind of tricked into feeling that it’s already done. And then because you’ve felt that satisfaction, you’re less motivated to do the actual hard work necessary.”

Be someone that does things, not someone who talks about things.

3. They spend time with losers

Spend enough time with losers, and you’ll become one. Apply this analogy to any type of person.

Do you want to get fit? Hang out with fit people. People feed off each other’s energy.

What’s better, your friend asking when you’re going to the gym, or your friend asking to go out for the third time that week?

4. They hate everything

They especially hate people that are doing well. Why can’t you be happy for other people? Don’t worry, you won’t be a Pollyanna. You can still be cool and be positive.

Give people some love, it won’t kill you. Unsuccessful people even hate things that just “are.”

“Ugh, it rained this morning, and my hair got all messed up. I hate rain.” Common, really?

Having a bad day is okay — everyone gets irritable once in a while. But if you always hate everything, you’ll have a bad life.

5. They procrastinate

What’s the benefit of putting things off? I once asked my college professor to extend a deadline for an essay.

He said: “I’m perfectly happy to extend your deadline by a week. The only thing I’m asking you is will your essay be better if you hand it in a week from now?”

My answer was “no,” so I worked my ass off to finish it on time. Only delay things when you’ll do a better job later.

What’s the point of delaying something if you get the same outcome? Do it now, or do it better later.

6. They don’t listen to others

Unsuccessful people love themselves. To be honest, we all love ourselves, but if you’re unsuccessful, you ONLY love yourself.

We listen to others because we care about them. How else can you show you care? Everyone can give a hug, but not everybody calls you just to ask “How are you?” Ask, listen, care, repeat.

7. They’re lazy

Never feel like doing anything? We’ve all been there: Not feeling like going to dinner with your partner, or not feeling like buying an awesome present for your mother’s birthday. Let’s face it, it’s all because you’re lazy.

Be a sport and get off your couch — participate with your family, friends, partner. The beauty of life lies in new and novel experiences.

When you’re lazy, you don’t even give yourself a chance to experience new things. It’s also not fair to the people in your life.

8. They don’t learn

Learning is one of the most difficult things in the world. It’s not a surprise many people never read a book, never finish school, or never learn from their mistakes. Learning is a struggle.

But think about it: We live in the most exciting time in history for learners. The access to information has never been this easy. In the past, if your dad was a farmer, you became a farmer. Things were like that.

Now, you can be anything you wish — you just need to learn how to do it.

9. They are not nice

Somehow, people think it’s cool to be a jerk. Honestly, it’s way cooler to be nice. You don’t have to be a Buddhist Monk or anything, just be a nice person.

Try it sometime; you might make a few new friends. And if you have difficulty defining what a “nice person” is, you’re likely a jerk.

10. They are quitters

I saved the worst for last. If there’s one thing you take away from this article, I hope it’s this:

“Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.” — Thomas A. Edison

There’s nothing I can add to that. Actually, there is: never give up. 

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