Posted by By Juliana Francis - firstname.lastname@example.org on
"Ladies no longer want love and romance. All they want are material things! Money! Money! Money! The other day, I took one out for a nice time. Immediately we got on the bed.....
"Ladies no longer want love and romance. All they want are material things! Money! Money! Money! The other day, I took one out for a nice time. Immediately we got on the bed, she said she wanted to rent an accommodation and and needed N500, 000. My eager manhood suddenly dropped. It fell asleep! Just look at me, where would I get such an amount? And that was the first time we would be going to bed together.
This behaviour has become common among ladies. Even after that lady, I tried another and it was the same thing. In fact, this one started telling me all her problems down to the latest business she wanted to start and the money she would need to start. I was on the verge of pulling off my boxers when she started her tales of woes and needs. The boxers were down and my erect manhood wilted like a dry leaf in harmattan. I didnít know whether to pull my boxers up or down. Julie you need to talk to ladies. What is happening to them?"
He wore a baffled look. He looked expectantly at me. See me, see trouble O, what does he want me to say? Short of seeking the two ladies out and giving them the third degree, I donít know the miracle he expected from me.
There were three of us there on the day of the discussion. The sun was scorching. We sat under the leafy shade of a mango tree, talking about these weird creatures called women. Now hold on there, I am a woman in every sense of the word! I have received mails from a lot of you guys, saying I am a man, writing under the pseudonym of a woman.
I am Juliana Francis, chikena! Just because I sometimes lambaste my fellow Eves doesnít make me a man!
Anyway, as I was saying, my other male friend also had something to say.
Hear him: "She spoilt my weekend for me. We were already in bed, about to get down to the basics where bones meet with flesh in happy wedlock and she started talking of N3, 000 for school. For goodness sake why pick that moment! While I was down to my boxers, She had not removed a piece of her cloth. It dawned on me that she wouldnít play ball except she gets the money. I told her that I would see what I could do. It was then she began to undress. I lost my desire. My manhood deflated. I picked my clothes and walked out of the room without touching her. That was the first time I took a babe into my bedroom without hammering her."
They both told me that they respect and cherish ladies who donít attach a price tag to their honey pot. Shameless sisters! What has happened to us? Why allow men to call us names? We have to do something and fast too!
Just like I said, itís not only ladies in brothels that are prostitutes. If you collect money from a man before you allow him a go at your honey pot, what does that make you? Go, ahead, think about it.
The terrible thing about having a price tag for your honey pot is the likelihood of the guy being pissed off to ram into you mercilessly. After he finishes with you, youíd think a horse rammed through your well. Every man likes being loved, but not for what you can get from him.
Before, the one sure way to win a ladyís heart was to wine and dine her. Sometimes take her to the beach and on her birthday, you buy her a gift or flowers. These days, no man with his right senses would buy a flower for a Naija babe. She would cane his arse silly with the bunch of flowers. Take her to candle lit dinner for a week without showing some dough and the next outing would find you being rudely burnt by the candle.
Tell her today and tomorrow that you love her; she would smile like it was her due. Tell her the third day and she would snarl, "Na love I go chop?"
Some monthís back, I was on my beat at Oduduwa in Ikeja. There, I met this lady who I think was on industrial attachment with one of the media houses.
She got on my nerves when she started criticising page 3 girls of The Sun. She called them whores. Her reason? They pose in a national paper and place their phone numbers for all to see. Hasnít she heard of taking a horse to the stream, but not being able to force it to drink?
How shortsighted can some people be? I marvelled that she was a graduate. She probably graduated from one of those glorified secondary schools called universities. I asked her the parameter used in judging the page 3 girls Ďwhoresí. I asked her if she was a virgin before she got married. I had to ask because she was acting as if she had never seen any guyís bulala except her hubbyís. She gave me a nasty look. I told her that she too could be ashawo married or not if we bother to base our argument on definition. I checked the dictionary on my own. It says: A prostitute is "One who solicits and accepts payment for sex acts."
To me, this means, accepting payment for sex could fall under collecting anything from your husband because you want to bang him. You turn his conjugal rights to your financial exploits. Haba!
Let us use this for the sake of argument. Your husband wants to bang you. You know he wants it real bad. You know the signs. You know that naughty wink. His sexual hunger has been building. He couldnít wait to get you alone. Then he finally corners you in his bedroom. He got you there under a pretext. The children are probably watching television. He wants it. You could feel his pulsating manhood biting you through the thickness of his trousers. You capitalised on that hunger. Just as he was smooching your neck, caressing and fondling those secret places, you asked him to give you money for the wrappers you bought from Mama Ebuka last month. Kai! Why then? Couldnít you have waited until after the show?
I put this analogy across to the lady and she calls it knowing how to get things from your husband. Knowing his weak point. She sees nothing wrong in asking for material things from her hubby during sexual solicitation. Do you agree with her? How do men feel about it?
Some ladies have some men as being soft where their balls are concerned. For some men, this may be true. Once they want it, they want it. They wouldnít mind promising the babe heaven on earth, just so they can bury that shaft down her warm cavity. They think with their balls. With such sexually weak men, taking money from them, in the throes of passion is as easy as chewing groundnut with popcorn! But is it a good idea?
Havenít you noticed the way a guy treats you if you donít always demand things from him? Respect is earned, not bought. Try to earn respect from your man. Show him that even if he decides to take a bow and walk out of the relationship today, you jolly well can do without him. At least financially. The less you demand, the more he would realise you love him and not his money. And for crying out loud, why ask your guy money in the heat of a bang or when youíre about to start? It kills the fun.
It means youíre equating yourself with the status of a prostitute. Where have all our love and respect gone? Come on sisters, put on your thinking caps! If you make love with a clause, you make yourself cheap. Youíre indirectly telling you partner that he can buy you at a certain price. Allow a guy to get to know you before springing the whole lot of your troubles on him. Have you ever wondered why he picked you among all the other ladies? Please donít make him regret. If he truly cares for you, as soon as he gets close to you, heíll see those troubles of yours. Donít make him bolt before he knows how special you are. Donít make money the corner stone of sex with a partner.
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