Posted by By Samod Biobaku, Nene Bassey, Rita Okoye on
Modinat Adamson, youíre asking me a mischievous question. Well, if I like a guy, particularly if he is someone I see often, I can begin to dress fine and make myself available for him to notice. Of course, if our path crosses, I wonít hesitate to say Hi to him, in a very special way, hoping that he would open a conversation with me.....
Youíre asking me a mischievous question. Well, if I like a guy, particularly if he is someone I see often, I can begin to dress fine and make myself available for him to notice. Of course, if our path crosses, I wonít hesitate to say Hi to him, in a very special way, hoping that he would open a conversation with me.....
In fact, there are many things I could do to attract a guy I like. As a student, if weíve got assignments to do or notes to copy, I could exploit the opportunity to interact with him. Once in a while, I could flash him a toothy smile. If after giving him all these signals and he still fails to key in, I might make the first move. Yes so!
I would always cheer up whenever I see him. Iíll also chat him up as often as I can. Iíll also get closer to him by asking him about one thing or the other. Ah! I almost forgot; I would pay more attention to my looks; dressing and all that. In short, anything that I could do to draw his attention, Iíll do it. There is no hard and fast rule about it. The situation at hand would determine what Iíd do. But definitely, Iíll do something to get what I want. Trust me!
Iíll first find out the things he likes. If he likes music for instance, it would be very easy to reach him. I like music a lot. In fact, I sing well. Part of the scheme could be to walk past him with a CD, a Walkman in the hope that heíd admire the stuff and ask me one or two questions about it. I am sure if he is interested in music, we would definitely click. If he also likes my personality, then we would easily blend.
I am a unique person. If I find a guy I like, Iíll just let him know right away. Iíll express my feelings to him. I donít believe in dying in silence. You see, all these moves about dressing to kill and all that, donít apply to me at all. Once I feel I like a guy or Iím attracted to him, I will summon courage to approach him. That is me o! I donít beat about the bush, like giving a guy green light to come and toast me. No, I donít do that.
Iíll start by drawing him into a conversation. Iím sure weíll be friends in less than a week. The moment weíre friends, nature would take its course. Only a dumb guy wouldnít recognise my Ďcome for meí signals. I believe interaction is the best green light you can ever give a guy you are interested in. Thatís the best way to get to know more about him. I personally believe that it is not a sin to do that if you truly love the guy in question. Thereís absolutely nothing wrong with that. It is not a sin, as far as I am concerned.
Youíll be surprised when Iím through with this. Iím a very open person. I also like to make friends a lot. I take my time to study people I hope to take as friends. So, if youíre my pal, you must be lucky. If I like the guy, Iíll definitely make moves to get to know him better. Iíll start by saying hello to him. At the end, weíll exchange phone numbers. By the time we get talking, I would have decided if I really want to date him or not. If at the end of the day I discover that I donít have feelings for him, weíll be platonic friends, nothing more than that.
I believe in building good friendship with people. Every decision I take affects my life one-way or the other. The same applies to the kind of guy Iím giving the green light and ultimately, the kind of person I date. I hate pretenders so Iíll show the guy what Iím truly made of. Iíll engage him in chats and weíll get to know each other better.
Well, my style is simple. Iíll try to get closer to by saying ĎHií to him from time to time. Getting a guy to warm up to me is not as hard as people might think. Yes, it could be hard for some babes, not me. For instance, Iíll ask him for one thing or the other because that way, weíll get talking. Of course, that is already a platform for us to chat. If I like the guy, I grab the opportunity fast. Iíll try to find out if he doesnít have a relationship. That is very important as far as I am concerned. True, some babes donít care, but I probe, just to avoid trouble. If the guy is already in a relationship, Iíll probe to know if he is happy in it. If heís not involved with anyone, Iíll let him know I like him and weíll hit it off from there. I am serious!
Anytime I see the guy, Iíll change my steps and walk in a more romantic way. I know it drives a lot of guys crazy, especially if he likes good things. I expect that heíd be bold to say Hi to me. The moment he says that, that will be it. One thing Iíve never done, and Iíll not do, is to toast a guy. Thatís not my style. But Iíll do everything to encourage him to just say Hi, even wink.
Without sounding vain, a lot of people tell me Iíve got a gorgeous smile. Do you agree with me (smiles)? If Iíve got a great smile, then I should be able to use what I have to get what I want. The next line of action might be opening a discussion with the guy. Thereís so much to talk about, especially if the guy is truly interested. Of course, Iíll also step up my dress sense. I know that guys love good-looking ladies. Taking the extra step, such as making the first move? Well, Iím not sure about that, but I donít think thereís anything wrong in walking up to a guy and telling him how I feel about him. But, Iíve got to admit, itís difficult and only few ladies with balls can make the move.
HmmÖ. I doubt if such a thing would ever happen. I accept the fact that I can admire a guy. It could be his stature, the way he walks or any other thing. If I admire him, I would keep it to myself. If our path crosses, I would just say the usual hello to him. Why should I start giving a guy signs that I have soft spot for him? It is ridiculous and heís most likely to take undue advantage of me. If you give a guy green light, he would want to play games with you, thatís bad. I donít go beyond admiration.
If I admire a guy, of course I will use what I have to get what I want. No, I donít mean using charms o! Iíll never engage in such fetish practice. Itís rubbish because I know there are some ladies that use it to enhance their chances of hooking guys. The bubble will eventually burst whether they like it or not. For the type of green light I can give a guy, Iíll look for ways to start a conversation with him. I believe that is leading enough. I would also let him know that I admire and have feelings for him.
Thereís nothing in expressing your feelings to a guy you admire, especially the one you desire his presence in your life. It is here in Nigeria that we place too much emphasis on such things. Weíre very conservative people. We all know how Europeans handle such things. An American lady would easily say to a guy: ĎI want to f..k you or Iíd love to have sex with youí if she likes the guy. The case is different in Nigeria. If you say a thing like that, youíd be seen as a very cheap girl.
If Iím attracted to a guy, Iíll focus on making sure we interact. If I discover that heís my kind of guy, Iíll work on winning him with smiles and other body languages. If he eventually woos me, Iíll tell him that we should be friends. Iím sure something good would come out of it. Guys are very funny. If you fall easily, theyíll treat you like a piece of rag.
A lady can always be tempted in such situations. Itís not always easy but Iíll do it. I will start with inviting smiles. If that doesnít work, Iíll take a bolder step by finding a way to get closer to him. Iím sure Iíll end up introducing myself to him. When weíre close enough, Iíll engage him in some form of gist. Guys love listening to sweet gist. Iím sure my charm will work the magic eventually. I am not unmindful of the fact that it is dangerous for a woman to make the first move in the game of dating. The danger is if the relationship hits the rock, heíll say things like: ĎAfter all, you were the one that toasted me.í
I can give subtle signals but it wonít go beyond that. How can I possibly approach a guy? Sorry o, I donít think I can stoop so low to approach a man, no matter how handsome he is. A woman has her pride to protect. But, if I truly like him to the extent of having feelings for him, Iíd be nervous around him. I just wouldnít be myself especially when he is close. But to show him a full-blown green light? Never. Itís like throwing oneís pride and dignity to the dogs. If he feels the same way I do, then Iíll let him make the first move. If he does, then we might just flow. You know exactly what I mean.
You must be joking. It is such a silly thing to do and Iím sure you know that. It is also dangerous because it creates the impression that you are not only cheap but a bloody flirt. The truth is that the moment a guy notices that you are attracted to him, it gets into his head. If you attempt to talk to him, he might snob you in a way youíve never ever imagined. I hate embarrassment so Iíll be devastated if it happens to me. If he snobs me, Iíll end up hating him and that would ruin the whole thing. Please o, I just canít try it.
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